Vinnie The Dainty

My curly hair journey

Being born with beautifully shining straight hair was awesome, and even felt best knowing I was taking after my dad for having this hair, but imagine if you woke up with curly hairs after having your first puberty knowing you change to your mum’s look (I mean the hair). What would be feel for a sudden change? It was quite disappointed to me at first and for a while.

Growing up with my curly hair, I have never known how curly my hair would be, or appreciated how beautiful the curls are. I’ve been on hair strengthening treatments since the first blow-dry techniques up to permanent (chemical) hair straightening treatments for many times over the past 10 years. Due to the beauty double standards back at the time I grew up, curly hair wasn’t on the list, and as of now, I’m still questioning myself for this standard as an Cambodian (Asian) woman. I don’t either see many Cambodian girls or women with curly hairs, or movement toward embracing curly hairs yet. Hair straightening treatments are still booming over there, even my mum is still having this treatment on and off. However, I hope the below questions and answers helps to reach out to those who want to make a change for better – BRING YOUR CURLY BACK!!!

1. What motivated me to embrace my curls? The first reason I started to bring my curls back was due to lockdown. THANK TO LOCKDOWNS!!! They have been worst for all of us, but for some reasons, I had opportunities to discover to my true self and that’s my CURLY hair. There was no hairdressers available, and I couldn’t keep having consistent treatments. The second reason was joining a group with curly girls called CGM group introducing by one of my clients who has been following this technique for a while. It’s been really impressive and supportive group which advise and motivate girls and women with wavy, coily or curly hairs to go on their curly journeys. The last reason is due to my hair fall. I mean a large amount of hair fall which started to thin my hair so curly hair is the best style that suits me.

2. What can you do to keep your hair healthy and curly (wavy or coily)? There are a number of techniques out there to follow, including CGM, but what I’m suggesting is keeping it simple. Hair is just like skin – you need to WASH, CONDITION, MOISTURISE, and PROTECT it.

3. Talking about CGM earlier, what is CGM? Let’s talk briefly about CGM! It stands for Curly Girl Methods and is an approach to hair care and certain hair product uses by Lorraine Massey for natural hairs (wavy, coily and curly hairs) by avoiding using shampoo and any harmful chemicals including ingredients and treatments.

4. Does CGM work for me? Honestly, getting to know the curls is such a complicated thing. The result varies from person to person and not everyone agrees to it. I’m still in the progress of experimenting this, and it partially works for me. Lots of curly girls love this methods, but some people say it’s quite costly due to certain product uses, but I’ll see how I go with it. Of course, there will be a to-be-continued post of my ongoing journey.

5. How do I feel now about my curls? I can say I feel more confident than any other time for having this though there are ups and downs about it. Admittedly, it wasn’t easy to revive dead hairs, but with persistence, maintenance, consistency and patience, I strongly believe it will happen. As I am in the progress of reviving it, I’m proud to have my beautiful curly hair that suits me than thin straight hairs.

6. How do I feel about the difference between curly and straight hair? Generally speaking, the straight hairs don’t need much maintenance, much products, and have less frizz – let’s say you can easily style your hair. To some certain culturally beauty double standard, people are classified as being gentle, elegant and professional. In contrast to curly hair, it’s consuming much time and efforts, facing uncontrollable frizz, and requires understanding about hair porosity, the amounts and ingredients of product uses, and environmental effects. The cultural double standard for curly hair could be categorised as being nasty, messy and lazy – and perhaps in a lower class.

Now it’s time to express myself through your look. It’s time to break this sort of beauty double standard. It’s time to love and feel myself for whoever I am. Curly hair can now be a gentle, professional and beautiful as others. My body, my choice! My curly hair, my expression!

Shocking truth about homemade cocktail creams/lotions

In my earlier post, I mentioned about my favourite serums I usually call it as cocktail serums, which can mixed 2 or 3 together to achieve maximum result. Honestly, depending on the day, I either apply one after another or simply mix on palms or fingertips then tap straight into my face. If you want to read more detail, you can click on the link attached to my cocktail serum. With the cream itself – either for face for body, I simply use the moisturised one and not for any whitening cream at all. It’s quite tricky because scientifically you cannot just mix anything together, especially active with the active ingredients; otherwise the effectiveness won’t work, just like a positive-and-positive magnets and side effects may happen.

I also remember when I grew up in my teen. Whitewash concept (back in Cambodia) was growing so high and so was the popularity of mixing creams. It wasn’t only just us Khmer, but other neighbour countries like Thailand and Vietnam or other parts of Asia, whom we got influences from were also doing those homemade creams. To maximise the result (either anti-wrinkle, pigment, acne, scarring, or whitening), they simply mix anything (any creams) – just like a man who might need 10-in-one shampoo for his everything. Yeah, surprisingly I mean ANYTHING!!!! As of now, it phenomenally won’t stop there yet. Thus, I’m going to express my thoughts for what I have read and watched about homemade cocktail lotions that some minor Khmer groups made, along with pictures below.

Pic. ⓞⓝⓔ Khmer homemade lotions. Credit: a member of THE WOMAN មនុស្សស្រី in Facebook group

Above pictures are the ingredients a member in Facebook group called THE WOMAN made her homemade cocktail lotions. As you can see some ingredients posted in there, she included CLARINS Double Serum, Lifespring – Placenta Marine Plus, Mosbeau – Placenta White, and Redwin Vitamin E cream (as only shown by a member). The only one good thing I like about this mix is she included CLARINS serum and Mosbeau – Placenta White. And why??? It’s because these two products contains good ingredients I like (not that I use those products) and with these one serum and one cream, they go well together. Well, I admit that I’m not the ingredients expert or specialist either. All I know of is there is no Parabens, Sodium Lauryl Sulphates (SLS), or Silicone ingredients in there.

First, I’m also wondering why would some minor groups waste so much of money to buy mix of the (expensive) products. That’s way too much!!! Second, other products that she mixed in contain Parabens and Silicone, and possibly bad ingredients we wouldn’t know of. If you mix with just one bad ingredients, it won’t be a good one – just like a bad egg mixing in 9 good eggs to make dessert. I also wouldn’t use two or three creams on my face – definitely only one for eyes and one for face, but not 2 or 3 creams at once. The worst thing I don’t like about is that she applied it for both face and body and you know that face skin is more sensitive than body skin. I know people obviously see the whitening, glowing result quickly, but that’s also how they harm their skin too. Over time of using it, the skin will surely turn to be sensitive, allergic and potentially link to cancer. Last, they are living in a place where it has NO four seasons or cold weather at all; it’s totally sunny all year round. No matter how much sunscreen you put on, your skin wearing that mixing cream can’t tolerate with external environments. Imagine how suffering the skin could go. This is a 5% yes and 95% no for me.

Pic. ⓣⓦⓞ Homemade cocktails lotions mixed with 15 serums, ampoules and creams

Now let’s have a look at another homemade lotion. It was posted in a clip video, and I just did a screen shot to show you as pictures. I admit that this is a BIG NO NO!!! Please DON’T TRY THIS AT HOME!!! The shocking truth about this cocktail lotion trick is 15 (ready-to-use) products in one PLASTIC big bowl – not a metal one – mixing like a dessert making. OMG!!! After watching this, I wouldn’t need to list the ingredients down here at all. It’s AWFULLY too much. She put serums, ampoules, light creams, and heavy creams – mostly contain Parabens, Silicones and other harmful ingredients. They all whitening products which she addressed the quicker result to be seen. However, the funny thing about this clip is she talked about the thickening consistency of her lotion, just as we do in our cooking. This is also an impressive marketing strategies for certain minor groups. Unbelievable and speechless!

Well, in short, I wouldn’t be too surprised with all sort of these stuff as it’s what I grew up and knew about it, but what really shocked me is the money, the effort and time they made this just to take risks having white skin and spread it widely on social media. Again, this is not a common truth for all Khmer people and I’m just eager to share you all what I’m thinking about certain things. Let me know in the comment if there are any other parts of the world that might do the same or similar.

Flowers give me strength

Since lockdowns become a popular key word during Covid-19 seasons, it strucks everyone down. In Australia, a place where I am living in and trying to endure with current 6 long and short lockdowns (since 2020), I have drastically changed my duties – from a full time worker to full time mum. Homeschooling kid is hardest part for me, but huge thanks to the teacher who help assisting online (and I’m still struggling pulling kid to do homework.).

My daughter in the second long lockdown last year

I need to learn with her, do homework with her and even physical exercise at home with her – just do everything with her on 24/7 everyday. Thank god – I’ve got just one kid. I couldn’t imagine if I had 2 or 3 kids. Big shout out to all mums with 2 or more kids!!!

Now, here in winter – too cold to enjoy life outdoor and no much flowers to refresh either. Looking back to photos of nature we went last summer or back in tropical country where I grew up in made me homesick and reminded me of my dad whom I lost last year.

Anyway, forget about the stress and the past, I hope these colourfully several photos help to sooth you mentally through these tough times, just like they do to me. Don’t forget you are not alone to feel emotionally down but learn to embrace yourself through things that you believe it can make you feel better.

Some are from my yard and others from where we went

Stay safe and take care, everyone!

Why do Cambodian people like romantic songs???

It may sound weird as it’s natural for people to listen to romantic songs – and of course it’s not only just for Cambodian people. What I’m trying to say is the themes of most Khmer romantic songs are usually sad though it’s all about love, grief, joy, reverence and fondness (compared to English songs).

I admit this is the first question coming to my thought that brought me to set up this blog. I’ve written and researched once but the answer doesn’t seem to be clear so I decided not to do anything till I found common-sense answers. Thus, if you are reading this post, you are knowing my answers right now.

Speaking of my mind, one of the reasons I came up with this question is because my Aussie-raised husband who was the one asked this question to me. Big thanks to him anyway. The second reason is I’ve passed my teenager hood and looked back to why I used to listen to love songs that much at that time. As of now, I seem to have less interest in romantic songs – it could be because I’m now mature, married and having kid I reckon.

Alright! Now let’s have a look at the answers. First, the majority numbers of Cambodians, who fonds of love songs, is high. Don’t get me wrong! Everyone else (aside from just Cambodians) do fond of love songs and I agree it’s natural for humans. In this sense, I don’t think it’s a cultural phenomenon. We Cambodians (Asian) are loving people. In term of saying that, let’s have a glance at the population data below.

Since after Khmer Rouge regime, the number of population was extremely low and majority were women and children. Thus, the country has to build up its population again. Thanks to Laura Mam (also more info about her) who addressed that Cambodians are busy people since then because we are busy making babies, and as you can see from data that the number keep booming. I also remember that there were no contraceptions at all – My great-grandparents would have 10 -14 kids and passing down to my grandparents who had 12 kids including their 6 step-children and now down to my parents who have 4 kids. Additionally, we are also caring people – we don’t only have good and strong relationship with partners and children, but also a caring respect toward elderly and look after them as well. Compared to Western World, we don’t leave our parents or elderly in aged care facilities (I know we don’t have one but at the same time it’s not great running this business over there, either). Being at home and unite with family is the happiness and best expectation of Khmer elderlies. Therefore, the bonds of love toward each generation are attached and stronger.

To my assumption, second is the strong influence from China. We Khmer live in the same continent of Asia – we have the sharing cultural conceptions and are even historically related to China. The musical format of Chinese is about emotional expression in romantic songs.

Influence of romantic songs. Source: Brightside

The last reason I believe in is the common influence and quiet revolution of sad (romantic) songs. According to Quiet Revolution, the sad songs are immersing people’s feeling by freeing their in-real-life emotions and it speaks out louder in different forms of emotion. Rather than just being sad, romantic (sad) songs is a reflection of our own feelings which give us comfort, pleasure, reminders, strengths to overcome, changing our hormonal balance, and even soothes you to be calm.

In general, love songs (or romantic songs) seems to get the hearts of all Cambodians in every way addressing all types of relationship and love between couples, children and/or parents. When you fall in love with these, the rhythms echo your heart and they keep touching your moods.

Why does Male Brazilian treatment cost more than Female Brazilian?

This question pops up to me when I advise male clients for their Brazilian prices. It’s pretty shocking compared female Brazilian price. For example, if female Brazilian costs $59, male Brazilian might cost around $159 – yeah, triple price. And what are the reasons why behind this???

No exact company policy that I know of would address the reasons why. To my assumption I’ve been working in beauty industry, specifically laser hair removal, I may explain to male clients the differences prices due to:

Male Brazilian is not very common (though there is significant increase recently) compared to majority number of female. According to Independent, male would prefer female or their partner to have womanscaping, to manscaping concept of themselves.
Plus, Hairallwomenstalk mentions male hair is thicker and grow faster than female hair.
Therapists herself have the right to reject to not treat male Brazilian if they are not comfortable. In term of saying that, therapists come from different backgrounds – some with conservative cultures which Brazilian area of male client is (kinda) against their culture or customs. Thus, clients need to pay more to get therapists who are able to treat.

How do you charge Brazilian for ladyboys or transgender clients?

This question is quite tricky. However, (theoretically based on company’s policy) to make it fair and clear to client is explaining them that price will be charged depending on physical appearance, BUT if you were lucky enough, you’d meet therapist who would just charge you for female Brazilian (and this may apply to those who also have less hair or light hair growth).

I hope these explanations may help clear doubt to those wanting to have their male Brazilian done.

Bamboo Shoot Myths

‘Don’t eat bamboo shoot because it will cause dangerous disease’

‘Don’t consume bamboo shoot! It will make the wounds worse.’

‘It’s definitely a NO for pregnant women.’

Since I was growing up, the myths around bamboo shoot become so popular. I also bet it remains till now. I love eating bamboo shoot (but not pickled ones), especially in a soup. The reasons why there are myths around bamboo shoot is due to the poisoning of Hydrocanic Acid.

Is it safe to eat bamboo shoot?

Yes it is safe if you know how to cook it well. You can’t consume it raw as it contain Hydrocyanic Acid that cause cyanide poisoning. Don’t consume it raw, know whether you are a suitable candidate to eat them. Don’t worry about canned varieties – they have been detoxified without further cooking.

IT’S ONLY ALLERGIC TO SENSITISED PEOPLE. Like nut, to some sensitive people, bamboo can give them allergic reaction that may bring dermatitis.

Benefits

According to Wellnessbin,

It help losing weight as it contains 27 calories in 100g per serve.
It contain high fibre to help digestive and cholesterol issues.
It riches in Vitamin B helping cellular enzymatic and metabolic activities.
It riches in minerals like iron, copper, potassium and magnesium assisting cellular activity and respiration.

There is no definite research saying bamboo shoot can cause any other type of side effects yet, but best to keep in mind that you can best eat it cooked and/or detoxified.

TEMPLE and PAGODA differences

These two words are the common words for people from Asia, particularly Cambodia and Vietnam. They mean similarly almost the same but refer to different things. In the straight meaning, temple is explained as a building devoted to worship of god while pagoda means a Hindu or Buddhist temple, typically in the form of many tier temple. In a clear context of Cambodia, temples are pretty much referred to any worshipped places for ancestors, gods and kings but is more likely addressed as heritage buildings; for example, Angkor Wat Temple or Bayon Temple.

Meanwhile, pagoda simply refers to a place where the Buddhist monks stay or live in and also where people can pray for their ancestors. You can also find it almost anywhere throughout the country. Ounalorm and Monhamontrey Pagodas are ones of the popular pagodas based in capital of Phnom Penh.

Ounalorm Pagoda and Mohamontrey Pagoda. Sources: Indochinvoyage and Cambodia calling site

In contrast, since I came to Australia, I was so surprised how people address pagoda as temple. It’s hard for me to clearly distinguish between these two word as it’s used differently. Unlike Asia, there are more churches than temple or pagoda. Asian temples in Australia are pretty much praying and community places for each culture, but not in the way I would address as heritage buildings like Angkor Wat at all. In my opinion, I am not sure if other Asian temples in Australia calling praying building as temple, but whenever you are talking to Australians, either born or raised in Australia, they understand temple as pagoda. I have also tried surfing Internet, the term ‘Temple’ is common in Australia, in opposition to Cambodia, where the term ‘Pagoda’ is popular. In that sense, WHEN YOU ARE IN AUSTRALIA, DO AS THE AUSTRALIANS DO, and WHEN YOU ARE IN CAMBODIA, JUST DO AS CAMBODIANS DO. By doing that, you won’t get wrong!

Kick 2020 out and welcome 2021

I know 2020 has really reaalllyyy a tough year for everyone. Some people lost their jobs, loved ones and businesses have crawled so hardly. It’s not the year that we want to face – the most depressing year ever!!!! I’m sure I’m not the only one who’s been through this – losing my dad during pandemic (not because of Corona virus) , unable to attend his funeral or giving him a hug for final goodbye, and getting stuck in the longest lockdown state ever.

Thankfully we are allowed to be out for new year celebration safely though it’s not like a normal festive one. At least I am able to travel local away from quiet city to take deep breaths with fresh air with nature. Now we all are looking for better and nicer things ahead. I wish you all the best – better dream and plans, being nicer to yourself and others and all positive things happen to you!

How much painful will you expect to tolerate when deciding to do laser treatment?

I get this common question a lot from those who have never done laser. Though some clients may have experienced doing waxing before, they are still kind of getting nervous about getting laser done. And of course, some clients are getting sweat before the treatment starts. Well, to some clients, the word ‘laser’ itself sounds serious, doesn’t it?. You might think of Laser cutter, laser machine used by doctors and specialists. That’s also how I felt when I first started my treatment. You are nervous! You don’t know whether you do it or tolerate the pain! But trust me! It’s not serious or too bad as you think it would be! Let’s say most people are doing it and all you want is to see the better result.

All I can express the pain in words to my clients is you are gonna feel like a rubber band flicking on your skin (just with the heat) or it can be expressed as insect-bite pain. In addition to that, the pain can vary from one person to another depending on their pain tolerance and areas of sensitivity. According to Healthline, underarms are one of the most sensitive areas when receiving treatment. It doesn’t have to be left or right as people may feel it differently. In the Teenvogue website, each area has been described by rating number which is quite predictable for first-time clients.

It’s also hard to expect from the first treatment what the pain is like as the hair is in fully grown stage. The pain can gradually decrease from time to time as the hairs grow less or patchy, plus you know what to expect after the first treatment. To those who have a very pain tolerance, if the first few treatments won’t help you much, you can take Panadol a few hours before treatment. However, avoid using numb cream because it restricts and slows the skin response to the laser which is hard for therapist to predict the good endpoints from the skin. Moreover, there are also extra conditions that simply give more sensitivity to the skin when doing laser such as: having hormonal period, body temperature, taking certain medication and individual’s pain tolerance level.

I hope this will help to open up an idea to those who consider doing laser for their first time.

Breast implants and breastfeeding

It’s quite a popular but controversial topic of having a nice pair of breast (with breast implants) and decision to breastfeed after birth. A number of women with cosmetic surgery, including breast augmentation, is sought after in USA, Brazil and China. In Australia in 2017, it was approximately 20,000 women underwent the breast augmentation.

Can women with breast implants be able to breastfeed? Yes, they can as the surgery won’t affect the ducts or the areas where the milk produces, including the nipples and areola. It’s pretty much placed behind milk glands or chest muscles. It can be possible depending on some factors such as the type of implant, the placement of implant and the way surgery was done.

What would happen to breastfeed when a mother has breast implant? Though there is no proven evidence of side effects but some possible risks may happen:

Possibility of maintenance in either corrections or removal
Change in breast and nipples sensation
Breast pain
Rupture of implant
Capsular contracture, which occurs when scar tissues forms around the implants causing squeezing

Does the milk supply from those with breast implants the same as that from those with natural breast? No, it may limit and compress milk supply.

Is it dangerous to breastfeed with breast implants? There is no enough evidence proving about side effects of breastfeed while having breast implant. All we know is that silicone devices in the body can potentially trigger inflammation and health issues.

What if breast implant leak into breast milk? There are two types of implants – saline and silicones. If saline leaks into breast milk, it won’t affect mother or baby. However, if silicones leaks into break milk, they are dangerous as it’s made from plastic.

If you have breast implants and consider breastfeeding, please consult your doctor or expert, you may be eligible to do so by having proper baby latching, breastfeeding often, and empty breast regularly.